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THE BEST OF
From Our July
2003
Edition |
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 ll it’s
summer, and that means those little McCarty grandbrats
will be out of school and bothering their parents by
hanging around the house. Just thinking about those summer
slackers makes me hotter than the vinyl seats in my
Dad’s station wagon. These kids today have it way easier
than we did.
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You
can bet those little McCarty grandbrats will be
complaining about the heat all summer long. “Oh it’s
too hot outside, I think I will lay down in my
air-conditioned house and watch cable television”,
Fiddle Fooey! When I was a kid, we played outside everyday
no matter how hot it was. We had to, because it was hotter
than an oven in that house we lived in. And when it was
really hot, we had a crappy fan that my Mom would turn on
to blow hot air on us. Sure, we were a sweaty clump of
kids huddled around an electric fan, but we didn’t care,
we loved it. Because if you talked into the fan, it made
your voice sound funny. |
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And
these kids nowadays with their skateboards and roller blades
think they are so cool because they like extreme sports.
When I was a kid, if we wanted a thrill, we would go to the
park and go down the slide sitting on a piece of wax paper.
We’d fly down that slide going faster than a rocket and
then when we were done we’d watch as some unsuspecting
little kid would fly down the slide and land about 20 yards
from the bottom. Sure, there were lots of injuries, but we
didn’t care we loved it!! Because we had a need for speed.
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And
these kids nowadays have to stay cool by going to water
parks, going on water rides, or going in a swimming pool.
When I was a kid, all we could do to get relief from the
heat was run through our sprinkler. We looked like idiots
prancing through the sprinkler on our front lawn, but we
didn’t care, it kept us cool! And sometimes, the park
director at Coyle Park would open up the fire hydrant and we
would have street showers! We would have high pressure water
squirting out of the hydrant flooding the streets while fire
fighters across the city were forced to respond to building
fires with a trickle of water coming from their hoses. |
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So,
if those little McCarty grandbrats come to you and tell you
they are hot and bored and don’t know what to do this
summer, just tell ’em to hold a piece of wax paper on their
butt and run through the sprinkler. Have a great summer!!!
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