October and that means those little McCarty Grandbrats
will be getting ready for Halloween.
Just thinking about those Dressed up Dingbats makes
me hotter than wearing a plastic mask with no air holes.
We had way better Halloween’s when I was a kid.
I’m sure some of those
Internet Idiots will be dressed up like Pokemon Go Trainers.
Like it wasn’t bad enough when we thought you were
just nerds on your iPhones, now you got to dress up and
prove it. When I was a
kid you got a choice of 2 things to dress up as.
You were a hobo or you were nothing.
Sure, my mom would burn my face by rubbing ashes on
my skin, but we didn’t care, we loved it.
And you can bet those Movie
Watching Morons will be carving their pumpkins to look like
BB-8 from Star Wars. When
we were kids we made our pumpkins look like Jack-O-Lanterns.
Two triangles for eyes, one upside down triangle for
a nose, and a crooked line for a mouth.
Sure after you lit the candle, the top would cave in
and the entire house would smell like burnt pumpkins, but we
didn’t care we loved it.
Healthy Choice Hallo-weenies will be having all kinds of
healthy and safe candy.
“Ewwww, we would prefer healthy fruit snacks or a gluten
free rice cake.” Fiddle Fooey!! When I was a kid we ate
gummy, sticky, chocolaty, candy with peanuts and if you had
an allergy, too bad! Sure
after Halloween every kid had cavities and a sty in their
eye, but we didn’t care, we loved it.
So you have
your fancy schmancy Halloween.
As for me, I’m having an old fashioned Halloween
like we used to. I’m
dressing up like a hobo and giving away chocolate covered Juju
Bees, and if you want to find my house, I’ll be in the one
that smells like a burnt pumpkin.
Metro - 9323 Sussex Avenue - Detroit, Michigan 48228