Well it’s March and that means those little McCarty Grandbrats will be going to all of these new teeny bopper concerts.  Oh, they will see Miley Cyrus, Jonas Brothers, and the Demi Lovato.   Just thinking of those Tone Deaf Teenagers makes me want to scream louder than their pre-recorded vocal track that they move their lips to.   When we were kids we had better concerts, in better places, and had way more fun than these kids nowadays.
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These Concert-going Cuckoos will be going to these concerts in Family-Friendly Arenas with comfy seats, handicapped bathrooms, and moving sidewalks.    In 1975, me and my brother Kelly went to see “KISS” at Olympia Stadium in Detroit .   That place was dirty, falling apart, and when you went to the bathroom, people were lined up peeing in the sinks.  Our seats were in the upper level in uncomfortable fold down metal seats that had about as much leg room as Dorf’s golf cart.  Sure when you reached to the floor to get your drink, you’d bang your head on the metal bar in front of you, but we didn’t care we loved it!!  Because we were at a concert!!

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And those Suburban Saps will be going through metal detectors and getting searched by uniform security personnel to make sure the concert is a drug free environment. When we went to that concert at Olympia there were so many drugs you couldn’t count ‘em. People brought Frisbees, Beach Balls, Boomerangs, and Bongs. We sat in a cloud of Marijuana smoke with about 200 Stoners passing the same joint. Sure Kelly thought the roach clip was a tweezers and pulled out a nose hair and then passed it on, but we didn’t care we loved it! Because it was KISS!!
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And you can bet those Technology Twits will be looking at all the special electronic effects with Video Screens, CGI, and Lasers.   Fiddle Fooey!  When we went to the KISS Concert, everything was real.  Peter Cris’s Drum Kit Exploding, Ace Frehley’s Guitar Starting on Fire, and Gene Simmons Spitting Blood and Fire.   Sure from where we sitting it looked like an ant burning in a magnifying glass but we didn’t care, we loved it!  Because it was KISS !!

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So you go to your Jonas Brothers’ Concert and while your enjoying a Smoothie and a Promise Ring, me and Kelly are going to the KISS Reunion Tour.   Were gonna get seats way up in the rafters and watch Gene Simmons spit fire and break his hip!

ROCK ON!!!
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