• DATELINE: MURFREESBORO,TN
  Tennessee has been getting its fair share of twisters these past few weeks with Murfreesboro being the latest area hit.  Sara was standing on her porch when she snapped this picture.

To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The stuff dissolves adhesive. 
 To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and kills germs.
Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving. The vodka disinfects the blade and prevents rusting.
Spray vodka on wine stains, scrub with a brush, and then blot dry. 
Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten pores. 
Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of healthy hair. 
Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle with vodka and spray bees or wasps to kill them.
pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water into a Ziploc freezer bag and freeze for a slushy, refreshing ice pack for aches, pain or black eyes. 
Fill a clean, mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers, Fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for 3 days. Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to aches and pains
To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back as a liniment.
To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.
Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting. 
Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the urushiol oil from your skin. 

Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain. 
To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew. 

1. It's important having a woman who helps at home, cooks, cleans up and has a job
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you
4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you
5. And finally, it's very, very, important that these four women not know each other

TIPS FOR HANDLING TELEMARKETERS

Three Little Words That Work !! 

The three little words are: 'Hold On, Please...' These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting. Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off (instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt. Then when you eventually hear the phone company's 'beep-beep-beep' tone, you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task. These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting.

Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end? This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone. This technique is used to determine the best time of day for a 'real' sales person to call back and get someone at home. What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times, as quickly as possible This confuses the machine that dialed the call and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer !!! 

Junk Mail Help: When you get 'ads' enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these 'ads' with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away. When you get those 'pre-approved' letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope. Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 41 cents postage 'IF' and when they receive them back. It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 50 cents before the last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-paid return envelopes. 

One of Andy Rooney's (60 minutes) ideas. Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back! If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them. You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to keep them guessing! It still costs them 41 cents. The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it...Twice! Let's help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, and that's why they need to increase postage costs again You get the idea! If enough people follow these tips, it will work ---- I have been doing this for years, and I get very little junk mail anymore.

MARCH
2009

Colleen Howe, 76, wife of hockey Hall of Famer Gordie Howe, Pick's disease. Mickey Goodwin, 51, one of the first world rated fighters to emerge from Detroit's Kronk Gym, 40-2-1 record, Stroke. Andrew "Test" Martin, 33, professional wrestler (WWE). Bill Davidson, 85, businessman, owner of the Detroit Pistons, former owner of Tampa Bay Lightning. Jeff Komlo, 52, former Detroit Lion quarterback, fugitive, car crash. George Kell, 86, baseball player and announcer (Detroit Tigers), member of the Baseball Hall of Fame. Dan Seals, 61, country music singer-songwriter (England Dan & John Ford Coley), mantle cell lymphoma. Irving R. Levine, 86, journalist (NBC news), prostate cancer.

Marvin Webster, 56, basketball player (Seattle SuperSonics, New York Knicks), natural causes. Mark (The Bird) Fidrych, 54, Detroit Tigers baseball pitcher, farm accident. Beatrice Arthur, 86, actress (Maude, The Golden Girls, Mame), cancer. 

By Millard Pickney: My wife Charlotte's dad, George Kintner, passed away on April 21, 2009 at about 2:00 am. He suffered with Alzheimer's for a number of years and has been living in a health care facility. Although Charlotte is grieving someone that she loves, she also knows that he is finally at rest. Funeral services for George were held Friday, April 24, 2009, at 11 a.m. at the Anderson Funeral Home, Adrian, with the Rev. Dave Morton officiating. Burial was in Lenawee Hills Memorial Park in Adrian.

Now that the presidential election is 6 months in the past, it is time to repair friendships with the other party. Alaska governor Sarah Palin is doing her part to do just that. The rest of the world cannot understand how, after bitter election campaigns, American politicians can kiss and make-up. For instance, Gov. Palin has invited, to her great state of Alaska, the men who defeated her, Barack Obama and Joe Biden. She has set up a moose hunting trip for their enjoyment and hired three prominent experts in their field to assist them. Dick Cheney will lead them on the hunt, Ted Kennedy will drive them back to their cabins each evening, and Bill Clinton will entertain their wives while the hunters are afield. What a lady! That Sarah is such a sport and thinks of everything!