| Little Jerry McCarty brings his dad's riot rifle into Mrs. Carey's class for show and tell. | Assistant Principal Mr. Sheldon comes over, takes a look at Jerry's rifle, goes to his car and gets his to show Jerry, and the rest of his class. | School immediately goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jerry hauled off to jail and never sees his dad's gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers. |
| Danny McCarty and Marc Condon get into a fist fight after school. | Crowd gathers. Marc wins. DJ and Marc shake hands and end up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled. | Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Danny and Marc. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though DJ started it. |
| Kelly won't be still in class, disrupts other students. | Kelly sent to office and given a good paddling by Principal Mr. Smith. Sits still in class. | Kelly given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Kelly has a disability. |
| Johnny Hebert, while throwing a football in the middle of Sussex Avenue, breaks Mr. McCarty's window and his Dad gives him a whipping. | Johnny is more careful next time, grows up normal, graduates high school, gets married, has 3 of his own kids, is a successful businessman and owns a Dodge Stratus. | Mr. Hebert is arrested for child abuse. He and sister Renee are removed to foster care and join a gang. As the news travels down Sussex, Steve McCarty is told by a state psychologist that he remembers being abused himself by his dad, and Bob goes to prison. Jean McCarty has affair with the psychologist. |
| Denise Brandel gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school. | Denise shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock. | Police called, Denise expelled from school for drug violations. Her home on Sussex is searched for drugs and weapons. |
| New kid at Parkman, Pedro Martinez fails 8th grade English. 
| Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to Brooks Junior High in the fall. 
| Pedro's cause is taken up by state democratic party. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for passing 8th grade is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given passing grade anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he can't speak English. |
| John (Boog) Nivilla takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed. | Ants die. 
| BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Boog charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, John's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again. |
| Timmy MacDonald falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his science teacher. Mrs. Korinsky hugs him to comfort him. | In a short time, Timmy feels better and goes on playing. | Mrs. Korinsky is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. |
