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Well there was this really handsome dwarf named Harvey. Now Harvey was a wild one he was; and Harvey had a habit of spending a wee bit too much time at the local tavern drinking the spirits. After about a pint an a half, he would try to climb down from his bar stool, wave and throw a wink in the direction of the young lass at the end of the bar at the time. Of course Harvey being a dwarf of sorts would inevitably lose his balance, and bang his head into the wall, floor, underside of the bar you get the picture. Well one day a visitor to the tavern saw this take place. He asked the bartender what was up with the dwarf. The bartender reply'd, "Oh, that's old Harvey doing his wallbanger again."
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So upon the strangers return home to his local tavern. He couldnt help but be reminded of old Harvey's story. Especially when he would see so many other men in the same sort of situtation. In fact he started telling this intoxicated fellows, "So you had too many of those Harvey Wallbangers yet?" And that is where they came from. Where did the expression, Three Sheets to the Wind come from? -Dennis
Three sheets to the wind, well that comes from a man returning home after a long night on the town celebrating with the drink. His wife would get up early start her wash, and put three rows of sheets upwind from her. Then when her husband would awake and start walking toward her. She would see if she could smell his alcohol ridden breath from one, two, or three sheets to the wind. If it was one, she would know her husband wasn't hung over. If it was too, it could be a long morning. Now if she could catch wind of it three sheets away, she at least had time to run and hide in town for the day, or until her husband sobered up.
What is more manly - a Yager Bomb or a Cherry Bomb? -Steve O
Now I hear a Yager Bomb could be highly intoxicating. Although, depending on which end and what kind of cherry bomb it is...... A cherry bomb could most definitely be more dangerous and most times highly explosive and the fumes, deadly.
My brothers made fun of me when I walked into a bar and asked for a draft. Am I missing something? -Mike
Did you check to see if hand toilet paper stuck to the bottom of your pants? |
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 Bar Room Joke 'o The Month Nine Months Later...
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's mini van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night. "I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house." "Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light." The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend. He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked: "Bob, do you remembered that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up North about 9 months ago?" "Yes, I do." said Bob. "Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?" "Well, um, yes," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out "I have to admit that I did." "And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?" Bob's face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"She just died and left me everything."
(And you thought the ending would be different, didn't you?)
Now keep that big smile for the rest of the day.
| Beverage 'o The Month
.Peach Martini 
Ingredients:
2 oz orange flavored vodka
1 1/2 oz tripel sec
2 oz peach schnaps
1/2 oz lemonade or sweet and sour mix
Preparation:
Shake and serve or ice or strain and pour into a martini glass ... enjoy |
A Bar Room Freakish Factoid |
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Do You Have A Question For Gwenda? |
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