The McCarty Metro - A Family Newspaper

Updated List of Competitors (UPDATED 7/15/05)

Jeff Beauchamp, Ty Ewing, Andrea Mahtaney, Mark Teggart
Thomas Drost & Team
Johnson Controls #1
Johnson Controls #2
Jack Crudder, Bob Crudder, Jim Crudder, John Roach
Donald Felmlee & Team
Tony Jankowski, Jason Nowak, Jim Nastulski
Mike Kaszubski & Team
Mike Kresbaugh & Team
Matt Keighley, Tom Keighley, Jeff Keighley, Brion Gallop
Tom Lech, Jason Lech, Ron Hudgens, Dan O'Connoll
Mike Leich, Tim Darmafall, Tony Colucci, Ryan Zemmin
Glenn K. Lukas & Team
Scott Marion & Team
Kelly McCarty, Dennis George, Angela George, Millard Pickney
Mike McCarty, Mike Dakesian, Brad Mathers, Steve Truman
Ryan McCarty, Jim Minnema, Brian Beckham, Steve Turner
Rick McCarty, Kevin McCarty, Larry McCarty, Jerry McCarty
Todd Offer & Team
Matt Scholl, Jerome Klotz, Todd Rammler, Nick Scott
James Seeling & Team
Mike Shallow, Kevin Wise, Jerry Seay, Paul D'Anna
Joe Sidor, Chris Sidor, Doug Sidor, Steve Prosky
Alan Stabler & Team
Larry Wendt, Dave Wendt, Tim Wendt, Mark Brown
Truman Wendt, Carl DiMaggio & Team

10th Annual Dan McCarty Golf Outing Registration Info as of 7/15/05.

PLEASE NOTE>>>>
If you DO NOT see your team on the left, you are not registered yet. Please click the DMCG link above to register ASAP!!!

BE A DMGC SPONSOR!

WE NEED SPONSORS!!!!
Current Individuals & Businesses Sponsoring The DMGC... WE NEED YOU TOO! (This is the primary way the event makes money for the Lupus Alliance)

Al Stabler, The Wendt Brothers, Johnson Controls *Michael Brown, Jack Crudder, Oakland Companies, Claymore Securities Inc.

Quick Puzzles (bet you don't know them)

Homework Schedule

1. How many former US Presidents are not buried within the United States borders?
Answer
.
2.How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25?
Answer
.
3. A man named Stewart is traveling all over the world. First he travels to Cape Town in South Africa. Then to Jakarta in Indonesia. Then to Canberra in Australia. Then to Rome in Italy. Then to Panama in Panama. Where does he travel next?
Answer
.
4. There are three houses in a straight row. They are the colors of the US Flag. The Red House is left of the middle. The Blue House is right of the middle. Where's the White House?
Answer

Austin McCarty just completed his sophomore year at Fraser High School with a 3.86GPA. He would like to help other McCartys by sharing his homework schedule.

Austin insists that students should not spend more than 90 minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the following manner:

* 15 minutes looking for assignment.
* 11 minutes calling a friend for the assignment.
* 23 minutes explaining why the teacher is mean and doesn't like kids.
* 8 minutes in the bathroom.
* 10 minutes getting a snack.
* 7 minutes checking the TV Guide.
* 6 minutes telling parents that the teacher never explained the assignment.
* 10 minutes sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom or Dad to do the assignment.

This Month's Contest
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YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2005, WHEN....
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Although there is still hope that the band members can put aside their differences for a 1 night only reunion, the band is just about dead. We want you to create the best tombstone for a Cockroach. Whether it be Brad Savage, Eric Swan, Bob Dantzer, Carl Rollin, Lance DeVoux, Steve Summers, Lake Speed, or Eddie Stein, go to http://tombstone.dogcrap.net/tombstone.php, click on the tombstone and follow the directions. Once you are done, attach your stone in an E-mail to me at editor@mccartymetro.com.

McCarty Metro Chat Room
The McCarty Metro Chat Room is open 24/7.

JOIN US!!!

We have a family & friends chat
every Sunday at 10pm EST

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of four.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You go home after a long day at work, you still answer the phone in a business manner.
7. You make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.
8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.
11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.
12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
13. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
14. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
15. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
17. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
18. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
19. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
20. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

I'm in the chat room ... all alone ... and it's SCARY! -Mike
ED NOTE: There, there, Mike... It's not that scary. Wait a couple of minutes and Ralph Montgomery will be in to tuck you in... NOW THAT'S SCARY!!!
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Hey Editor. I have a bone to pick with you. On the Dan McCarty Golf Classic page, I distinctly remember being in the picture with Dan, eyeing up his line and the break of the green. What happened to me.... It's like I was never there!!! -Wiacek
ED NOTE: Mike, sorry about that... I did also come across a picture of when you introduced President Bush during a campaign visit to Michigan.

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Dear Editor. I believe there was only one Suss-comb 500 bike race ever held in Detroit, circling Sussex and Whitcomb. Are there any plans to relive that excitement and get some of the original founders to compete? -Creighton Isshi
ED NOTE: Funny you should ask. Last year, The Metro tried to sponsor the Goldridge-Valerie 500, in which all the still living members of the original race were to compete. Race organizers hired Mike McCarty to do the first lap and scout out the track. He got lost, and we haven't seen him since.

Yo Kel, is there any way to save some of the pictures you have on the top of the metro that are scrolling by? Or maybe a separate page of just pictures to look at them individually? Thanks, ever so. -Kristen
ED NOTE: You can save the pictures on the scroll by right clicking on the pictures, the clicking save picture as when your picture comes up. It will freeze on that picture and allow you to save. If you would like a full size picture that is on the scroller, just let me know and I'll forward it.

Jelly!!!!!!! Thanks for coming out to the 'Hayloft'. It was fun seeing you guys. Next time we'll have to get that old fart of a brother of mine to show!! Let me know if the 'Cockroaches' reunion happens.........Thx. again -Lance Davoo
ED NOTE: Awesome job Lance.

Congrats to Brad for being the first responder to Mom's car accident in the parking lot. And way to go Kelly for taking the car to the shop. The editor is be commended for remembering Dan's essential car tip: A coat hanger can solve any car problem. I would like to point out that I solved a car problem the other day in a different way. My problem was a power rear window that was down and would not go up. Here for the benefit of Metro readers is my solution:
INGREDIENTS: 1 roll of duct tape, 1 scissors, 1 old semi-clear plastic carpet runner (or garbage bag or cardboard, whatever it takes to cover the window.)
STEPS: Cut out area of plastic (or garbage bag) slightly bigger than window. An extra inch or two all around will do. Next, place plastic over the window hole on the outside of the car. Tape plastic to car. Drive. NOTE: Drivers who use their cars to go on a first date should use a harder substance. If you use a flimsy plastic bag and take the freeway, the wind will rattle the plastic so loud that your conversation will consist of:
YOU: What did you say?
YOUR DATE: What, I can't hear you?
YOU: Talk louder, I can't hear you.
This is how one of my early dates with Karen went in the Dodge Dart, which for some reason lost its back window.
All the best in car repairs, -Mike
ED NOTE: My Spidy sense tells me this is more of a bit than a sound off comment
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I was able to identify Steve McCarty's famous grilling hamburgers, but what the heck is that large piece of meat on the side ... and who ate it? -Larz
ED NOTE: You are referring to Steve's Memorial Day BBQ. He cooked up a great selection of burgers, dogs, and things that run around in mom's attic. It was a win-win situation. Mom now has a quiet attic, and your Metro editor was one satisfied customer!!! (Pictured to the right is the meat on the grill, then the sammich it made next to the neighborhood kid that we had to wedge into the attic to retrieve the carcass)

THANK YOU KELLY! -Sincerely, James E. Seeling, Jr.
ED NOTE: See world.... some people actually like me.