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Well I just got back from taking my McCarty Brats out to a restaurant, because my nosey neighbors would probably call child protective services if I made them eat at home for more than two days in a row. Those spoiled McCarty’s love to eat at fancy schmancy restaurants. Just thinking about those Gourmet Goofballs makes me hotter than the molten filling on my Tuna Pot Pie. When I was growing up we ate at home all the time. |
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Nowadays, you go into a restaurant and you can’t even get a plain Iced Tea to drink. They got Passion Fruit Iced Tea, Guava Iced Tea, Papaya Iced Tea, and even Peach Iced Tea. Fiddle
Foey! When I was growing up you only had a choice of two things to drink, you got Cherry Kool-Aid or you got Nothing! My Mom would put twice the recommended amount of sugar in that Kool-Aid so we’d be bouncing off the walls. Sure we’d leave the dinner table with Sugar Glazed Eyes and a Red Kool-Aid Mustache but we didn’t care, we were happy with what we had. |
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And those Epicurean Idiotic kids today love to order those fancy Pasta dishes. They get their Pasta with Pine nuts, Artichoke Hearts, and Pesto Sauce. When did that crap become Spaghetti? When we were kids the only Pasta my Mom made was Hamburger and Noodles, which was the cheapest ground beef at the A&P and elbow macaroni. And the sauce was a can of Hunts Tomato Paste. Sure it tasted like eating Alphabet Soup and Kraft Dinner, but we didn’t care we loved it. |
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And for those sweet-toothed Dessert Dorks love to look at the dessert tray to decide between cheesecake and Terra Mi Su. When I was kid, my Mom would throw a dented box of a Saunders Coffee Cake that had an expiration date about two weeks before. Sure it was dry and it was like eating a Brillo Pad, but we didn’t care, we loved it!! |
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So you keep taking those little brats of yours out to dinner at restaurants, but the next time my kids say they want to go out, they’re gonna get a swift kick in the keester and I’m taking them to Grandma McCarty’s for an old fashioned dinner. And if they don’t like the Hamburger and Noodles and Kool-Aid, it’ll be no Brillo Pad for them!!
Have a great summer!!
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