McCARTY NEWS
  • DATELINE: GRAND RAPIDS
    Mike McCarty has now been retired from the Grand Rapids press for a few months. Mike has taken much time to get that "Honey Do" list accomplished. Here are just a few of the repairs Mike has made in and around the home.

Mike with his "handy" spare tire. Mike fixed that pesky faucet leak
.
Mike makes Karen a nice chair to use while sitting outside Mike does a little work on the
exhaust manifold of Karen's car
Fixing a $3000 Taylor guitar
is a snap
.
Mike's front defrosters never worked better Who needs to spend a lot of money on a car-top carrier
.

  • Evan McCarty swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. Now back home, the McCarty Metro phoned to ask how Evan was doing, his father Jerry answered, "No change yet.

  • In Dana McCarty's school, a rubber band pistol was confiscated in an algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

  • In Nashville, Tennessee, Larry McCarty shares a story about the new love in his life. "She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still."

  • DATELINE: SAN FRANCISCO, CA
    SF Police Department consists of Chief Heather Fong (left), the first SFPD female chief of police; Theresa Sparks (center, former male), president of the San Francisco Police Commission, CEO of a multi million dollar sex toy retailer, and a trans gender woman. Sgt. Stephan Thorne (right, former female), the first transgender SFPD police officer. Their Representative in Congress is Nancy Pelosi. ED NOTE: This pretty much explains why we are where we are.

  • DATELINE: FROM THE BUREAU OF ALCOHOL, TOBACCO & FIREARMS
    The ATF is releasing this study submitted by the VBV boys including the Metro's very own Kelly, Steve O, Jim, Jerome, Matt, and Larry. The study revolves around the determining factors of how intoxicated people are.

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Martina (rolling the R)
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 

1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. White Castle? Taco Bell?? ehhh... No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7. Why on earth would I want to fight you? You can obviously kick my ass!

8. Thank you, but I won't attempt to dance. I have no coordination and I'd hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, I have to work in the morning.
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McCARTY METRO ALERTZ !!!!

This may be useful to know when grocery shopping, if it's a concern to you. The whole world is afraid of China-made "black hearted goods". Can you differentiate which one is made in Taiwan or China? If the first 3 digits of the barcode are 690, 691 or 692, the product is MADE IN CHINA. 471 is Made in Taiwan. 

This is our right to know, but the government and related departments never educate the public, therefore we have to RESCUE ourselves. Nowadays, Chinese businessmen know that consumers do not prefer products "MADE IN CHINA ", so they don't show from which country it is made. However, you may now refer to the barcode, remember if the first 3 digits are:

690-692 … then it is MADE IN CHINA
00 - 09 … USA & CANADA
30 - 37 … FRANCE
40 - 44 … GERMANY
47 ... TAIWAN
49 … JAPAN
50 … UK

BUY USA by watching for "0" at the beginning of the number. We need every boost we can get!

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN IN JULY, 2009

Karl Malden, 97, Academy Award-winning actor, (On the Waterfront, A Streetcar Named Desire, Streets Of San Francisco), natural causes. Steve McNair, 36, football player (Tennessee Titans, Baltimore Ravens), shot. Gordon Waller, 64, British singer (Peter and Gordon), cardiac arrest. Walter Cronkite, 92, former CBS television news anchor, cerebrovascular disease. Gidget, 15, Chihuahua, Taco Bell mascot, stroke. Reverend Ike, 74, evangelist, stroke.

Virginia H. Kintner, age 83, of Adrian, Michigan died Tuesday, July 21, 2009. She was born April 20, 1926, in Adrian, to John and Martha Neal. On August 10, 1944, she married George L. Kintner in Adrian. He preceded her in death on April 21, 2009. Virginia was a member of the First Church of the Brethren. She was a Blue Bird Leader for ten years and also served as Secretary and President of the PTA at Alexander School. Virginia ran a day care in her home for 11 years. Virginia is survived by three sons, Charles Kintner and his wife, Nancy of Tecumseh, John Kintner and his wife, Sue of Adrian and George Kintner and his wife, Brenda of Waldron; two daughters, Charlotte Pickney and her husband, Millard of Sterling Heights and Sharon Church of Williamston, MI; 14 grandchildren and 13 great-grandchildren.

In addition to her husband, she was preceded in death by her parents; a son-in-law, Gary Church; three brothers and four sisters. Funeral services for Virginia were held on Friday, July 24, 2009, at 11:00 a.m. at the Anderson Funeral Home, Adrian with Reverend Dave Morton officiating. Memorial contributions may be made to the First Church of the Brethren.

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN IN AUGUST, 2009

Corazon Aquino, 76, Filipino politician and the first female President (1986–1992), colon cancer. John Hughes, 59, film director, screenwriter, and producer (Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Breakfast Club), heart attack. Eunice Kennedy Shriver, 88, activist and founder of the Special Olympics, sister of John F. Kennedy. Les Paul, 94, guitarist and inventor, complications from pneumonia. Robert Novak, 78, conservative author and pundit, brain cancer. Ted Kennedy, 77, Senator from Massachusetts (1962–2009), brain cancer. Ellie Greenwich, 68, songwriter ("Be My Baby", "Chapel of Love"), heart attack.

Aunt Loretta (Loretta E. Houtteman) passed away on August 21, 2009 at the age of 96. Loretta was born on November 5, 1912 in Detroit, Michigan. She was the loving sister of the late Emma Schmelzer, John, Richard and Otto Houtteman, Margaret Wieske, Julie Russo and Virginia Houtteman. She was survived my many nieces and nephews. The funeral took place at Our Lady Queen of Peace Catholic Church in Harper Woods, Michigan on  August 25. Memorial Contributions may be made to the Capuchins 1820 Mt. Elliott Street, Detroit, MI 48207.

AND FINALLY...

  • DATELINE: DETROIT, MICHIGAN
    I had a bunch of Canadian dollars I needed to exchange, so I went to the currency exchange window at the local bank. Just one person was in front of me… an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars and she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change?? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I get hunat eighty?? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations". The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white peopo too!”

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