I WOULD LIKE EVERYONE TO TAKE A SECOND AND CAST A VOTE IN THIS IMPORTANT CAUCUS. REMEMBER, PEOPLE HAVE DIED FOR YOUR RIGHT TO VOTE IN THIS MCCARTY METRO ELECTION. I WILL POST THE RESULTS IN THE NEXT MONTH'S METRO.

LAST MONTH'S RESULTS... GET YOUR DVD AND VCRS READY!!! The MAY QUESTION was If, in the event of being quarantined in a room for a month with a DVD player, and you only could bring in up to 5 DVD's, which ones would you bring?

* Denotes Multiple Votes... Which means it MUST be good.

 Kel, Another great job On the Metro. This is from another "autumn" guy who, despite all his lunk headed moves, is still kicking. You do the same. -Mike
ED NOTE: You're a good big brother.

 To the editor: Based on your recent commentary and posted review of the Garland Golf Resort I actually feel very comfortable with our groups decision to visit this facility. You see, I spend the majority of my life in a hockey rink during the year so this past season I began bringing a golf club with me to the rink to get the proper feel of a club in sub zero temperatures. The only negative affect could be that if it is sunny or rains my current training regiment will have been a wasted effort. There is another group that goes with us (last name McCarty) who I fear will benefit tremendously from the potential cruel conditions and give them an unfair advantage because worm burners travel farther on ice than grass. Thanks for your review and I look forward to more from you. -"The Holder Of The Green Jacket"
ED NOTE: Lighten up Francis. I'll let you return the green jacket for a yellow raincoat.
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Editor, I enjoyed reading Steve's "King of My Castle" column, but I have a few problems with it. In the first place, Steve does not have 9 friends. And if he did, the bill would be a heck of a lot more than $100. And Kelly, Seeling, Wally, and Matt would throw up and not be around to pay the bill. And lastly, if there were 10 of them out for drinks, that cheap ass, Steve would pretend he was out with clients and charge it to his company and nobody would pay a thing. -Smoothie
ED NOTE: Hey smooth man. I know Steve McCarty, and you got him all wrong. The only part you got right was Kelly, Seeling, Wally, and Matt not being around when the bill came. They would be tossing up SoCo and Coneys.

Dear Editor, I've suspected for some time that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with "the girls" a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them." I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls". It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared to have a hairline crack right by the club head. Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the pro shop? -Perplexed
ED NOTE: In reading between the lines, it sounds to me like you have a much bigger problem than just a cracked club head. Having your clubs in the garage might mean they are picking up additional moisture and grime. You may want to make an appointment to have them re-gripped as soon as possible.